This month I had intended to write a blog all about balance and how beneficial it is to our wellbeing to have good balance. This is something I’m really enthused about, because I’m passionate about sharing knowledge about just how much yoga can help us live longer and healthier lives, and improving balance is just one of the many ways it can do this.
‘So hang on a minute, you’re telling me you’re feeling really stressed out about yoga, which was what you started practicing to feel less stressed?’ asked my partner, and yes, the irony hadn’t been lost on me either, as I sat down at my desk to work on meeting yet another assignment deadline.
I’d already been practicing yoga a few years when I found out that my mum had a complicated terminal diagnosis and that life would never be the same again. Up until then, I’d enjoyed going to a weekly class as a means to counteract the pressures of a full on veterinary nursing apprenticeship that had led to a demanding shift nurse role at a leading veterinary referral hospital.
‘The thing is,’ said the woman to her friend, ‘is that I can’t reach anywhere near my toes, and everyone else around you will be going so much further, and then you just feel so stupid and like this really isn’t for me. And that,’ she concluded, ‘is why I can’t do yoga.’
Paul Grilley
One of my favourite principles of yoga is Svadhyaya, or self-study. Why? Because what greater investment can there be than getting to know yourself – really, truly, deeply know yourself. Not only is the relationship with oneself the only relationship guaranteed to last a lifetime, but I believe that how we think, respond, our beliefs, our perceptions, our behaviours, our habits – all these aspects of ourselves – all affect our reality and the quality of our lives more than anything else.
It seems to me that we live in a time when we require self-discipline more than ever. We are endlessly encouraged to scroll more on our social media feeds, with no real natural end point other than our own will power. There is a proliferation of processed food, some of which is deliberately designed to be the perfect mixture of sugars and fats to drive us to not want to stop consuming it. We can buy pretty much anything, at any time, from anywhere, and expect it to arrive with relative instancy. It’s possible to binge watch what we want to view, on demand, without having to wait until next week. And there is an endless supply of emails and other notifications which could keep us hooked in indefinitely.
When was the last time you felt content? Can you remember? And what exactly did it feel like?
Yoga helps us to connect to, and work with our energy in lots of different ways. One of the principles of yoga is Brahmacharya, or ‘right use of energy.’
Self-caring, self-love and self-compassion can sound a bit fluffy or indulgent, but the science behind them and the power of these practices – and they do take practice – is clear and becoming increasingly spoken about.
Would you like more peace? More moments of your day, your life, where you feel peaceful or at peace? I suspect, that with the tendency of our modern lives to be increasingly busy, with seemingly unending demands for our time and attention, that we all want more peace.
If you enjoy a regular practice of yoga, whether self or teacher led, you may be attracted to the idea of a retreat. And certainly, yoga and meditation and all other manner of retreats are everywhere right now, so there is plenty of choice! But what does it really mean, to go on a retreat?
Lockdown 2020 and I’m sat in what has become a familiar spot – on my yoga mat in front of my laptop. I hold the Mala beads aloft in my right hand, and feel their cool, calming shape pass across my finger as I guide each one with my thumb, as instructed by our online teacher this evening. Om Gum Ganapataye Namah I repeat over and over, the rhythmic movement of each bead tracing each repetition of the mantra. Coordinating the movement of my tongue, as it wrestles with these hitherto unfamiliar Sanskrit words, with the dexterity of my thumb and finger manipulating the beads, is all consuming and there is little room for the bombardment of thoughts that usually visit me during meditation. As I finish, 108 beads and repetitions later, a connection must have been formed between me and my newly acquired Mala, because it soon becomes a regular companion for my practice. And unbeknownst to me then, in just a few months’ time from our introduction, these beads will join me in the labour suite as I look to anchor myself during the prelude to my son’s arrival into the world.
Anyone that knows me will know that I am a huge fan of Dr Rangan Chatterjee’s work and his holistic approach to well-being. Since devouring his latest book, Happy Mind, Happy Life, from cover to cover, I am now digesting it more thoroughly, by working my way through the practices that it suggests will help you to become a calmer, happier you.
Have you ever sat quietly long enough to observe your thoughts, perhaps to meditate, and noticed that many of them are negative? Or maybe when you’ve come to be still for long enough you’ve noticed an inner monologue which might be distinctly unfriendly towards you, perhaps judgemental or critical? Knowing that we might encounter negative thoughts or a less than kind inner voice can be why we often avoid the quiet, why we try to avoid being present, and instead look to constantly distract ourselves (hello smartphone, conveniently always there to assist with this …). These uncomfortable thoughts are also why Ruby Wax has likened doing a silent retreat to being like ‘iron man for your brain’ and I can almost visualise it as some sort of mental ‘tough mudder’ as your brain slings mud at you whilst you make your way through the silence. (Thanks brain)! Buddhist teacher Pema Chodron writes that we can think of ourselves as the sky, and everything else, such as these difficult thoughts, as just the weather, although as actor Andrew Scott put it in an interview, some days it is positively ‘storming down on you’ – something I know I can relate to.
In his book ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’, Viktor Frankl says ‘between stimulus and response is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.’ Take a moment to read that again and consider it fully:
‘Have your head in heaven and your feet on earth’, a riding teacher once said to me, I think having once had it said to her by one of her teachers, much like the lineage of passing down knowledge that has, and continues to, disseminate the practice of yoga.
I remember my first Vrksasana fondly. Somewhat careworn and stressed, but having proclaimed myself ‘too busy’ to go to yoga class, my wise and wonderful friend bought me two private sessions with her Yoga teacher as a birthday present. Balancing in my Vrksasana in the first of those sessions, I felt that wonderful kind of happiness – a mixture of focused, absorbed, peaceful, both challenged and content, and just, well, good. ‘Look, I can do yoga’, I said joyfully, as I proudly replicated my Vrksasana again that evening in our family kitchen for my mum to see.
We all know how great we feel after that long yoga class – refreshed, relaxed, restored – but how can we get more of that feeling into our everyday lives? Since the arrival of my son at the end of October, there has been little opportunity for long periods of practice on my mat and I’ve found out how easy it can be to tell yourself, ‘I just don’t have the time for self-care.’ For moments like this, when you feel there’s no time to stop, I think this quote from Anthony de Mello says it all:
At the end of December, I committed to completing 100 miles for Suffolk Mind, challenging myself to walking the distance in the 37 days before my 37th birthday.
When you decide to take a yoga class, whether online or face-to-face, to some degree you are putting yourself in your teacher’s hands. And as yoga is a holistic practice, it is your whole self – mind, body and soul – that you bring to the class, it makes sense that you want your teacher to be someone you can feel safe with and trust. But have you ever been curious to find out more about your teacher and their training? What does a yoga teacher need to know so that they can guide you in such a way that you can enjoy a safe, sustainable, and nourishing Yoga practice?
